Saturday, November 08, 2003

Hope. It is very illusive. I have spent the last few weeks trying to figure out what it is that I have hope in. I know that I can't put hope in myself. Because I seem to always let myself down. I can't put hope in people because they are too much like me. But I trust Christ. And that's about all that I can hope in and for. That's a very encouraging thought. That I don't really have to have hope in the people around me, or the things around me. I can focus all of my hope on one thing. Jesus. I am a youth pastor, and I lead a very small youth group. I have been there for about 4.5 months and I love it. But, I have been putting too much hope in my ability to lead this group, and I get very discouraged when this happens because I always realize how much I suck. I can't be all that I need to be. But the nights that I just say, "OK God, this is all in your hands. Do your thing." Everything goes amazingly better then I could ever imagine. I love that.